Voices

We can't hide sadness no matter how hard we try.


Angelica was walking half-way down the street where she parked her car the night before. She looked up and saw the impending rain, who was about to burst and again flood the streets with sadness and frustration. Drowning in her own thoughts she suddenly heard a young man, probably in his early twenties told her something weird.

the stranger said, "and lungkot nmn..."


She looked up and saw the man looking straight at her. Seeing him looking concern and harmless at the same time, she didn't mind him. She proceeded walking. But within her, the voices just wont stop talking, obviously she did mind what he said.


"ang lungkot nmn... ang lungkot nmn..." the voice of the stranger echoed endlessly.

"napansin nia na malungkot ako? mkha ba tlga akong malungkot? malungkot ba tlga ako?
ayoko mging malungkot... hndi dapt ako maging malungkot... this is my choice.... mine and mine alone... dont tell me hindi ko npaninindigan pangako ko, dont tell me kakainin ko sinabi ko...hindi..."

"anu ba tlga gusto mong gwin angelica?" Another voice said.

"gusto ko lng nmn maging masya, maging masaya khit wala na xa... i want my old life back... living without him... laughing not because of him... being happy not just by his existence... i want to learn... how to live like i used to...un lng..."

"un ba tlga ang gusto mo?" A familiar voice asked.

"hindi ko alam... hindi ko alam...cguro!"

"paano kung di tlga yan ang gusto mo?" The same voice asked again.

"bhla na... e di gugustuhin ko na lng...wla na akong magagwa pa...dhil gnwa ko n ang lht."


She unconsciously pulled out her key and slid it through the hole, pulled the door as she entered her car in a daze. she began to pull back her own thoughts and organize it.

"im better off this way! i cant afford to stay like that forever! Angelica, you have to go!" She shouted.

Her voice filled her car momentarily while it subsided to pure silence. She brushed her hair with her fingers while she started the engine as she sped away with her heart still beating but with a hole where he used to reside.

And as she finally said goodbye to Joshua, one thing is for sure... she will find happiness... once again... one of these days.


Sa laht ng tumangkilik ng storya ni Angelica... dito na po muna mgttapos ang kwento niya... hangga't di pa ako nakakaisip kung panu ito ipgpapatuloy... hehehehehe... babalik po si Angel... panagako!!

promise

The sidewalk was wet.It was raining the whole night. There was a huge fog engulfing the place. it was blocking out all the sunshine wanting to get through. Wanting to get through her. Angelica all curled up in her nicely done bed staring blankly in the dark. Thinking. What would happen to her now? Why did she do that? Silence went on like forever until the sound of her telephone broke it into pieces.

Angelica: hello?

Gerald: Angel... musta na?

Angelica: *silent*... im going..

Gerald: where? sama ako!

Gerald then heard the stricken tone of her voice...

Gerald: what is wrong?

Angelica: im going away...

Gerald: ha? di kita maintindihan...

Angelica: im letting go...

Gerald: from where? or from whom?

Angelica: him.

Gerald: oh! him.... y?

Angelica: im so tired... i should have done this a long time pa...

Gerald: buti narealize mo na yan... lam na ba nia?

Angelica: yah...

Gerald: let me guess... no comment sya... at la syang pakialam...

Angelica: yah. She whispered.

Gerald: o e bkit ka gnyan? did u do something more than that...?

Angelica: i promised.

Gerald was dumbfounded. He now knew the gravity of the matter, Angelica never breaks her promises. She never did. Gerald was worried. He knew that this would not be easy. It wouldn't. But he will not leave her side. After all she is his closest friend.

Gerald: kaya mo yan Angel! ikaw pa! dont sulk... isipin mo na lang may dahilan ang lahat... party na lng tau...
san tau bukas?

Angel laughed at his proposal. She appreciates him...more than he would ever know. Then out of nowhere, a surge of strength ignited her half-alive senses... and realized that she has friends, real friends and she will be with them tomorrow evening and party like she never had.

Angelica: tell you what? yah! i can do this! Embassy 10pm... call them up... see u there!

She put the phone down and went outside. At last, Sunshine broke the gates of the depressing Fog. Angelica walked out into the sun, and let herself bathe in the warmness of the light. She felt better. And knew that with the right dose of encouragement and control, she knew she can fulfill her promise... after all, she has no choice.



This is the second episode of Angelica. hope you liked it as well...

stranded heart

Angelica was surfing through the channels when all of sudden she stopped by Cube TV.. it was playing the music video of Alipin... she suddenly became sullen and put her head down on the table and felt the pain she thought was not there.., she remembered her dream the night before...

in the dream:
Angelica overheard Joshua and Richard talking.

Richard: kayo na daw sabi nga niya..

Joshua: *silence*

Angelica: ei may girlfriend kna? im happy for you!

would she be really happy if in reality Joshua will find someone new, would she be strong enough to face it?, Angelica thought.
she kept her head down while letting the pain into her system. the song still playing in the background fueling her emotions.. prolonging the moment... cradling her agony. she misses him and she knows that. she wants to be brave or try to act like one. she wants to forget him. she wants him out her life. she wants to start anew; with or without him it doesn't matter! she has to move on.

Angelica allowed the song to end, after which she got up from her seat, carried her dishes to the sink. made a joke out of the roasted chicken her mom is cooking and made her way to her room. took a pen and a paper and wrote:

i can do this.
i will do this.
i have to.
have to save myself.
must kill the pain.
must not go back.
must throw him out my heart.
its been too long.
i have to live,
like i did once before.
have no choice,
but to say goodbye.
for the last time.
for good.

Angelica clung on to the paper as if for dear life. she has to stop loving him.
she knew that, as tears rolled down her sober face.


enjoyed reading it? i enjoyed writing it too... hehe... who is angelica? she is my latest fictional character. through this short written episodes i shall bring her to life.
tahtah...